Grace for the Kids: Therapeutic foster homes needed for children with mental health diagnoses

COLUMBUS COUNTY, N.C. (WECT) - Boys and Girls Homes is looking for more people willing to become therapeutic foster parents, a specialized level of foster care for children with behavioral and mental health diagnoses.

Therapeutic foster care supervisor Bianca Richardson said children placed in the program have needs beyond those in traditional foster care.

“Our department has the children in foster care who have behavioral diagnoses, mental health diagnoses,” Richardson said. “They might have more severe behaviors than a child in traditional foster care.”

To qualify for therapeutic foster care placement, a child must have a mental health diagnosis. Richardson said common diagnoses include oppositional defiance disorder, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, and depressive disorders. She said those diagnoses can stem from environment, genetics, or severe trauma.

“They may have to have more therapy. They may have to have more one-on-one care,” foster parent Tamora Vereen said. “They just need that extra little love is what we call it.”

Tamora and Gary Vereen have taken in seven therapeutic foster children over the past eight years. They said flexibility is essential.

“We may start out saying, ‘Oh, we’re going to go to supper.’ But we might wind up eating pizza. Because maybe they had a meltdown for whatever reason,” Tamora Vereen said.

The Vereens said they approach each placement without placing blame on the child.

“We go into it saying, you know, nothing that these children go through is their fault. Nothing. They didn’t cause this,” Gary Vereen said.

Betty Sturdivant handles emergency placements, meaning she receives calls within minutes of the Department of Social Services removing a child from their home.

“If DSS takes a child, 2 o’clock in the morning, and they need somewhere for that child to go, they will call us,” Sturdivant said. “I get up out of my bed, get their room ready, and they bring the child.”

Sturdivant said she has taken in nearly 100 children over the past two decades. She said children in emergency placements often take a while before they trust their foster parent and warm up to them.

“They’ll be pushing. Because they don’t trust,” Sturdivant said. “‘I’ve loved before, and this didn’t work. So now I’m going to push you away.’ So as a foster parent, I had to learn I’ve got to give them time. You’ve got to go through the trauma that that child has been through. You’ve got to know their family history. You have to know what this child’s bringing with them into your home.”

Richardson said Boys and Girls Homes works with prospective foster parents during training to identify what they feel equipped to handle.

“We ask them during classes, what are some behaviors you think you could handle? What are some things you can’t? What are age ranges?” Richardson said.

Sturdivant encouraged anyone considering the role to take the first step by calling Boys and Girls Homes.

“Don’t be afraid. Step on out there. Take that chance. Because that child needs you,” Sturdivant said.

The Vereens said they initially assumed someone else would step up — before deciding to become that someone.

“We said, ‘let’s just let somebody else do it.’ But who is the somebody else? We’re the somebody else,” Gary Vereen said. “Every child deserves at least a foundation to try to receive a very loving family and a normal life like most kids live in.”

Richardson said the need for therapeutic foster parents remains urgent.

“We need people. And unless people decide to take a chance, then there are kids who will remain in the system,” she said.

You can call Boys and Girls Homes at (910) 646-3083.

For more information about fostering, adoption, or volunteering through Boys and Girls Homes, click here.