I can't believe I'm actually doing this. I'm going to talk about Paris Hilton. It's a conversation I thought I'd never have, but the events of the last month have made her a household name - even in my house!
I'm amazed that this no-talent, 26-year-old excuse for a celebrity has captured the attention of an entire nation. I know that sounds harsh and, yes, the details of her legal case made this an interesting story, but only mildly so. It's certainly nothing deserving of the coverage it's received.
Most of you have probably reached that point in life when you realized it's not all about you. The world does not revolve around your existence. It's a painful lesson for everyone, but probably a lot more difficult for someone born into so much wealth and instant fame. Then comes a wake-up call, "Honey you're going to jail! Daddy can't buy you out of this one. Welcome to the real world."
But then, when she was released this week, a mob of photographers surrounded her limo. She had more cars following her home than O.J. Simpson had police cars in pursuit. Larry King devoted an entire hour to her, and many of you probably watched. Why are we Americans so obsessed with celebrities - especially dysfunctional celebrities? Guess what? Right now, the world really does revolve around Paris Hilton. Before her it was Anna Nicole Smith, or Britney's shaved head, or whatever the celebrity scandal of the month happened to be.
You know why the events of the last month won't work as a wake-up call to Paris Hilton? It's simple really. In the final analysis, it's not Paris Hilton who needs to wake up. It's the rest of us.